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The Parent Manual: Tip 2

Posted by Karen Murphy on

We continue to build a UBC parenting manual… I always look forward to receiving my daily Parenting Tip from The National Center for Biblical Parenting. Each day I find myself asking the question… ”Is this something that would benefit our UBC parents?” Below is one that I hope you find helpful! It is my hearts desire that you will find something in one of these tips useful in your parenting journey. 

Parenting Tip:  Teaching Children to Affirm in Conversation

This parenting tip comes from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids, by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Many children don't know how to listen without thinking about the next thing they want to say. Or if they do listen, they make statements like, "I know," or "I can do it better than that." Instead, teach children to affirm others in conversation. It's part of learning what it means to be a servant. Listening can be hard work. It requires that children think of the other person, not just of themselves.

Children can say, "I agree" or "You're right." Instead of launching into their own version of the story, teach them to encourage the other person first. "That must have been exciting," or "You saw a fun thing." Good responses in conversation are "Oh, that's interesting," or to ask a question. Conversation can be self-serving or others-serving.

If your children continually talk and rarely listen, encourage them to affirm the last thing you said before they begin talking. Affirming others' speech is a skill that children will use forever and it helps them address a little of their own selfishness now. Furthermore, it makes conversations with children more pleasant and enjoyable.

What do you think?  I am thinking this might even work on folks my age!  I would love feedback on how this worked with your family.


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